Shadows and Silk Read online

  “No they won’t,” he said, locking the door behind them. “This is a lot nicer than the men’s room. No wonder it always takes women so long.”

  The floor was square adobe tiles and the countertop was a quartz granite that picked up the colors in the floor and walls. A small wicker loveseat and two chairs sat against the opposite wall, and lotions and tanning oils were lined across the counter. It was clean and smelled of lemons, and best of all, it was private.

  “I think you’re insane,” she said. “I don’t understand this at all.”

  “Men tend to lose their minds when women are involved. Now answer my question. Do you need to hear the words before you’ll marry me?”

  Her eyes narrowed and her hands fisted at her waist. “Of course I need to hear them, you dumbass. But what you don’t understand is that I need you to mean them. That’s why I won’t marry you. Now let me the hell out of this bathroom so I can go enjoy my goddamned honeymoon.”

  He caught her as she tried to walk past him and lifted her against him, dodging the knee she tried to jab between his legs and the elbow that glanced off his jaw. He hoisted her up on the counter and pushed her legs apart. The kiss he gave her was rough, a kind of conquering, and his teeth nipped at her bottom lip once before his tongue slipped inside and devoured. His hand fisted in the back of her hair and he yanked so her mouth was tilted higher, and he felt triumph as she moaned into his mouth.

  Her nails raked over his chest and her fingers gripped his shirt and ripped it open, sending buttons scattering across the floor. They broke apart, panting for breath and staring at each other as if they were strangers. He shouldn’t take her in anger—he knew that deep down—but dammit, he was angry. And hurt. Her logic didn’t make sense to him.

  She licked her swollen lips and leaned up so she could kiss her way across his chest. And then she bit him—hard—and he lost the rest of his control completely. Maybe she was a little angry too.

  He pushed her thighs wider apart and growled at the sight of the G-string that was barely covering the folds of her pussy. The fabric was dark with her desire, and he slipped his fingers beneath the fabric and touched the syrupy folds. They both groaned at the touch, but he wanted so much more. He wanted to brand her—to make her his in every way. His hand fisted around the fabric and he tugged sharply, tearing it from her body and letting the tatters fall to the ground.

  “Fucking beautiful,” he rasped, pushing her legs further apart so she was completely bared to him. “Look at that sweet cream waiting to cover my cock. I want to taste you, but that’ll have to wait. I’m too impatient.”

  “Brant,” she cried as he slid two fingers inside of her without warning, thrusting hard and fast and taking her right to the edge of pleasure before she could draw a breath. He pulled the cups up her bikini top down so her breasts were exposed and his mouth clamped over a turgid nipple, sucking it with hard stroked that had her pussy rippling around his fingers.

  “You’ll be the death of me,” he said, kissing his way to her other breast and this time scraping the nipple with his teeth. “My greatest distraction.”

  “So walk away,” she said through gritted teeth. “Take what you want and then leave.”

  His fingers pushed deep inside of her and then he stopped moving, feeling the way she clamped around him and the pulsing tissue that signaled she was about to come.

  He kept his hand still, his thumb pressing over the hard bud of her clit, and he slowly curled his fingers inside of her until he found the raspy tissue that made her eyes roll back in her head.

  “There, baby,” he whispered. “There it is. You’re so fucking tight. So wet.” He rubbed his fingers over the spot in slow circles, and her body jerked like it was being shocked.

  “Pl—please,” she begged. “I can’t stand it.”

  “Is this all we have between us, Darcy? This endless need to fuck? I thought you loved me.”

  Her hips moved against him—thrusting and undulating—searching for release, and his fingers stilled until she opened her eyes and looked at him.

  “What do you care?” she said. “According to you, my love isn’t real anyway. It’s a lie, right? So just fuck me and let’s move on.”

  Something snapped inside of him. He’d always found comfort in the way she’d loved him. In the way he could count on her to be there through the years and warm the cold places in his heart. But when he looked at her now, he couldn’t see that warmth any longer, and it terrified him. Because the look on her face reminded him of the way Vivian had once looked at him, when he’d been buried balls deep inside the woman who was supposed to love and honor him. He’d been too caught up to realize what she had planned until she stabbed him in the back with the blade she’d hidden under her pillow. The way she’d climaxed around his cock while she waited for him to die was imprinted in his nightmares forever.

  He closed his eyes and pushed the memory away. Vivian wasn’t Darcy. He knew that deep down. He also knew what it felt like to be on the receiving end of Darcy’s love. And now he knew what it felt like when it disappeared.

  “Damn you,” he whispered. “Don’t shut down on me. I want everything.”

  His fingers moved faster inside of her while his thumb rasped over her clit with every stroke. Her head banged against the wall, but she either didn’t notice or didn’t care. Mewling cries escaped from her throat and her arms collapsed so she fell back against the counter. He took a nipple between his thumb and finger and squeezed, and then shot her into ecstasy.

  He was wild and hungry for her, an animal who needed to give her the sharp edge of pain and pleasure to justify his own. And then he felt the ripples start from deep inside her. Her pussy clamped around his fingers like a vise, and she cried out in delirium. Her nails dug into his arms as liquid pleasure coated his fingers and ran down her thighs. The climax milked his fingers and all he could think about was how it would feel against his dick.

  “Fuck, yes, baby,” he groaned, jerking at the button on his pants and freeing his cock. He gripped the base tight in his hand, holding back the come already boiling in his balls, and he slowly withdrew his fingers from her vagina. She whimpered and went lax, her body melting against the counter.

  He moved between her thighs and lifted one of her legs so if rested on his shoulder. Perspiration glistened on their skin and he rubbed his dick against the folds of her sex, causing her to moan with aftershocks from her orgasms.

  “Look at that, baby. Look how I’m going to stretch you.”

  The head of his cock was dark and angry looking, swollen and flared, and he waited until her eyes opened and traveled down the length of her body to where their flesh joined. He pushed the head of his cock inside and gritted his teeth. She was wet, but her tissues were swollen from the orgasm, so he still had to work himself inside of her. The muscles in his thighs strained to hold back, and then he remembered the condom he had in his pocket. He never in his life resented the use of protection more than in that moment.

  “Look at me, Darcy,” he said, pulling out and then pushing his way back in, going deeper this time. Her eyes lifted to his and he saw arousal and defeat in their depths. “This thing we have between us isn’t going to go away. Why wouldn’t you want it forever if you could have it?”

  Brant repeated the motion—pulling all the way out and pushing in twice more until he was finally seated to the hilt. Even completely still, he could feel her vaginal walls milking at him, undulating against him in a torture bound to make him lose his mind.

  He cursed viciously and pulled out, reaching for the condom in his pocket. He tore the packet with his teeth and rolled the condom over his shaft, praying the thin layer of latex would help him last longer than thirty seconds. Her breasts were framed and pushed together by her swimsuit, and her breath heaved in and out of her chest as she lifted her hips to meet him.

  “Answer me, Darcy,” he said.

  “You wouldn’t understand,” she said. “Stop torturing me and just do it
, dammit.”

  He heard the frustration and tears in her voice, and he didn’t know what made him keep prodding her for an answer. The answer he wanted.

  “Tell me what I don’t understand, baby.” He pushed inside her slowly, watching as her flesh sucked him inside, and a wave of heat stole his breath and tore through his body. “Tell me,” he demanded.

  Her head dropped back and she closed her eyes, so he couldn’t see to deep inside of her. “You are what you are. I can’t change that, no matter how much I once loved you. Marrying you and loving you would destroy what’s left of the feelings I have for you, Brant. And I’d wither away waiting for you to return those feelings.”

  “You don’t know that.” He pushed her knees up so they rested by her shoulders, and he knew he couldn’t wait much longer. “We could be happy.” He felt her hands reach down and take hold of his hips, and before he understood what she was going to do, she impaled herself on his cock, and he sank into the greedy depths of her pussy.

  “God, Darcy,” he groaned.

  “No more talking. Just fuck me, Brant,” she panted. “Please.”

  Her words pushed him past that last edge of control, and he slammed inside of her over and over again. She refused to look at him, to make that connection that had once been so special the last time they’d come together. Hopelessness and anger built up inside of him and he was relentless in his pursuit for her pleasure. Her screams echoed in the tiled room and she grabbed her breasts, tweaking the nipples between her fingers and making his balls tighten at the sight.

  “Is this what you want, Darcy?” he said, the violence barely restrained. “Nothing but a good fuck now and then, and then we can all go back to the way things were? Like it never happened?”

  His hands went beneath her ass, and he lifted her, changing the angle so his cock hit something that made her go wild beneath him.

  “Yes, damn you. It’s all I want.”

  “Then so be it.” His hips jackhammered inside of her, and her pussy clenched around him in one long shuddering pull. They cried out together as they came. Electricity shot down his spine and pleasure thundered though his veins as he jerked against her one last time, semen shooting in powerful spurts that left his knees weak but his heart cold and empty.

  His body trembled and his cock flexed within her, still spilling into the condom he knew had just been torn to shreds by his release. He’d felt the power behind his orgasm and known the second the latex had burst open.

  “And sometimes it all comes down to fate,” he whispered, feeling the stickiness of his come between her thighs.

  “Wha—” Darcy said, barely coherent. Her face was pale and she struggled to get her eyes open. He thought she would have slept just where she was if he hadn’t pulled out of her body.

  “Are you on birth control?” he asked.

  Her eyes opened a little wider at that and she looked down to the shredded condom he was discarding.

  “I—um—I’m on a light dose. To keep my periods regular.”

  “If you get pregnant, you’ll marry me. I mean it, Darcy. That’s not something I’ll budge on. My child will have a father around.”

  “Fine, but you don’t have anything to worry about. The timing’s off, and you’ll have to ask fate to lend you a helping hand some other time. Or maybe I should buy the condoms next time,” she said, pushing him back so she could slide off the counter.

  He moved back and shook his head at her denial. Her hands trembled as she retied the sarong and tried to cover the fact she no longer had on a bathing suit bottom, and he knew the sudden show of nerves was because she knew as well as he did how powerful that release was. She couldn’t not be pregnant after that. And she knew it as well as he did, timing be damned.

  He adjusted his pants and left his shirt hanging open since it no longer had buttons, and he waited patiently as she wet some paper towels and tried to clean away the evidence of their passion.

  “So you agree?” he asked just to make sure. “If you’re pregnant you’ll marry me?”

  She straightened her shoulders and lifted her chin. “Yes,” she finally answered. “But if I’m not, I want you to agree that both of us will walk away after a certain amount of time. We’ll walk away forever with no hard feelings and no regrets. I want a life with a man who can give me everything I need.”

  “And how long is a certain amount of time?” he asked incredulously.

  “I figure a month should be long enough for us to fuck ourselves into oblivion and be ready to move on.”

  “A year,” he heard himself say, his back teeth clenched so hard he was surprised they didn’t turn to dust.

  She walked past him and unlocked the bathroom door herself, but he kept her from going out until he’d looked to make sure there were no threats. She turned to look at him, her hands on her hips as if she were thinking through the positives and negatives of their negotiation.

  “Six months,” she countered. “With the option that if either of us decides it’s not working then we can move on.”

  She’d be pregnant before the month was out. He’d make damned sure of it. That was a loophole he was going to make sure wasn’t covered.

  “Fine,” he said, smiling. “Six months. But our time doesn’t start until after this mission is over. I want six months of undivided attention. I’ve got a lot of vacation time saved up, and we’re going to spend all of it naked.”

  “That ought to give my family a cheap thrill,” she said, raising a brow. “The holidays are just around the corner, though I’m almost positive your idea of a Thanksgiving spread and mine are completely different.”

  He cracked out a laugh before he could help it and felt some of the tension ease inside him. Six months was plenty of time to convince Darcy that the sweeping love she believed in was nothing more than contentment between two satisfied people. And he planned to make her very satisfied.

  Chapter Eight

  Six months was going to have to be enough time to convince Brant that he loved her. If her plan failed, she’d have no choice but to move on. She was making a gamble, and it was all or nothing.

  Darcy had made a decision after she’d thought on Declan’s words that morning. She could fight or she could let go. It was really that simple. And she wasn’t ready to let go. The plan that came to mind had butterflies bouncing in her stomach, because it could just as easily backfire.

  But she knew Brant. Knew how he approached and handled things. And the only way she could see to reach him was for him to get a taste of his own medicine. For her to be the one who only wanted a casual fling and nothing more. To make him realize how cold sex and intimacy could be when the love was held back.

  The only thing she had to worry about was not letting him see past the deception—the way his touches and their bodies became one really affected her.

  Darcy stayed to the edges of the main path, feeling more than exposed without her bathing suit bottom, slight as it had been to begin with. And she could feel the burn of Brant’s gaze from behind her, no doubt checking out her ass. A look over her shoulder told her she’d been right about where his eyes had been looking, and she raised a brow when she saw he was already hard again. If this plan didn’t work, the sex alone might kill them.

  “Maybe I should let you walk in front next time,” she said. “It’s been awhile since I’ve gotten to ogle your ass.”

  His mouth quirked and his eyebrows raised in question. “When was the last time you ogled my ass?”

  Her smile was mischievous, and she cocked a hand to her hip so the split in her sarong showed more of her thigh. “You mean other than watching your naked behind walk out of my house in the middle of the night four years ago?”

  He scowled at that reminder, but there was no heat in her words. She was starting to understand why he’d thought he’d had to leave. He had feelings for her, and he was scared to death.

  “You stopped coming to the house as much as you used to,” she said. “But about ten
years ago, I guess Cade had talked you into staying with us for a few weeks one summer. I spent that time checking out your ass, and every other part of you, while you helped my brothers bail hay and repair the fences. You wore jeans and no shirt, and all those muscles flexing made my young heart go pitter-pat.”

  Darcy placed her hand over her heart and fluttered her lashes, and Brant smiled again. He didn’t do that nearly enough. She knew he had a great family, parents and a brother and sister who loved him, but Brant had always been a little bit of a loner. And there was a sadness inside of him that always hovered just around the edges.

  “I remember,” he said. “You spent that summer traipsing around the house in tiny shorts that barely covered your ass. I thought your brothers were going to kill you.”

  “I was nineteen. My brothers are overprotective asses.”

  “They had every right to be. They knew the way I tried not to look at you.”

  “Don’t worry, sugar,” she said, using one of his endearments. “I noticed. And I looked right back. Especially that time you went skinny dipping down in the stock tank. I got an education for sure.” Her eyebrows waggled and she turned back towards the hotel, twitching her hips a little.

  “You little brat,” he said, the amusement obvious in his voice. “Someone should have spanked you more as a child.”

  “I thought you were going to do that?” She smiled as she heard his low growl and then thought back on that summer. “Tell me something, Brant. When you came to stay with us that summer, you seemed angry with me. More angry than your usual self, I guess. But it was more than the sexual frustration that always seemed to be between us. It was like you hated me. You had a fresh scar on your back, and you’d lost weight. I remember how red and angry it looked against your skin, as if it had barely healed before you’d come to us.”

  “I remember,” he said softly, and she could tell by the sound of his voice that the smile and playfulness she’d sensed in him earlier was gone. “Just like I remember you getting pissed at me over not giving in to you, and then you started dating that Freeman asshole.”